How Dropping Out of University (and Going to College) Helped Me Re-find Myself 

The minute I decided to drop out of university, I felt a great weight lift off my chest.  

I had spent the previous four years trying my best to succeed in an environment I wasn’t thriving in. I was struggling. I couldn’t handle a full course load, and even when I dropped courses to make the semester more manageable, I was lucky if I passed the classes I stayed in.  

I switched majors constantly — at least once a semester — in the hope that finding the right program would lead me to success. It never did. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. This constant failure in my classes and not knowing who I even wanted to be had a profound impact on my mental health. I was in a very dark place, and I knew if I stayed in university, it wasn’t going to end well for me. 

However, I didn’t want to be labelled a dropout. In my mind, the label carried bad connotations. If I dropped out, that meant I was stupid, a disappointment to my parents. While I know this train of thought was incorrect, it was still hard for me to overcome the feeling of failure. I had hit a plateau in my life where I wasn’t accomplishing anything. I had tried to succeed at university, but nothing was working, so I resorted to my last option — giving up. 

Giving up isn’t always a bad thing. According to ​​Tina Seelig, who has a doctorate in neuroscience, quitting can actually be beneficial.  

Seelig wrote in an article for the Stanford Technology Ventures Program, “Quitting allows you to start over with a clean slate. And if you take the time to evaluate what happened, quitting can be an invaluable learning experience.” 

Giving up on university allowed me to reflect on what went wrong. It also made me really think about where I wanted to end up. 

So, what went wrong? 

I chose a program I wasn’t suited for, resulting in poor grades. These poor grades led me to spiral, resulting in more poor grades. It was a loop I was stuck in. 

Where do I go from here? 

This was the tricky part. I knew I wanted to keep studying, but clearly, I wasn’t meant to be studying at a university level. My dad had mentioned college a couple of times over the past few years, but I kept brushing the idea away.  

When I was in high school, the idea was pushed on us that the ​‘​smart kids​’​ went to university and the rest went to college — or nowhere at all. I needed to let go of this notion in order to take my next step in life. Going to college instead of university doesn’t make you dumb, it just means you have different goals. College programs are a lot more narrow than a typical university degree program. If you take journalism, you will be trained to become a journalist. If you take cardiovascular technology, you will be trained to become a cardiovascular technologist.  

The day I decided to leave university was the day I reclaimed my life. I called my parents and told them I was dropping out. My plan was college, but I wasn’t sure which program just yet. 

Eventually, I settled on journalism. I always liked to write, so I figured it’d lead me towards a career I could be happy in. This year, I graduated from Algonquin College’s journalism program with honours. Turns out I’m not dumb, I just needed a different learning environment. 

The two years I spent at college were the happiest I had been in a long time. I was doing well in my classes, making friends and I had finally found my passions — the environment, animals and finding ways to make a change.  

The very first story I wrote for the school paper was about pets for adoption on campus. The whole reporting experience — meeting the pets, learning how the vet tech students care for them, taking photos and piecing together the story — was such a high for me. In that moment, I knew I had found my place. 

I’d be lying if I said the change wasn’t scary. I was 22, restarting school, while people I graduated from high school with were starting their careers. However, I quickly found out I wasn’t the only student who didn’t come directly from high school (a silly thought for me to have when very few of my classmates were fresh out of high school).  

One of my classmates, Sophie Daly, had a similar experience. 

“I fully believed I was unteachable after I left university since I failed so hard,” says Daly. “I was so nervous to go to college and possibly fail again.” 

Daly landed on the Dean’s List every semester.  

“College taught me that I am smart in specific fields,” says Daly. “STEM isn’t for me; I’m more of a visual learner. That isn’t bad and it doesn’t make me less of a learner.” 

While I sometimes think about how it took me six years to earn a diploma, I’ve learned it’s okay to start over. It allows us to grow. I don’t have any regrets about the path I’ve taken — I just wish it didn’t come with a pile of student debt.